Why is my child so incompatible?

Why is my child so incompatible?

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Opposition-Defiant Disorder-KG, “KGB is a behavioral disorder in children and adolescents. The disobedience of the child or adolescent to a normal degree is manifested by his arguments and his attitude towards the family. En ELELE Child and Family Psychological Counseling Development and Education Center Specialist Clinical Psychologist Sedef Aksoy, tells the curious about the subject.

KGB is a behavioral disorder in children and adolescents. The child's or adolescent's disobedience to his / her normal age is manifested by his / her argumentative attitude and his / her resistance to the family.

Many children and adolescents exhibit this type of counteracting behavior in their developmental process, to a certain extent normal. However, in children and adolescents who are diagnosed with KGB, this type of behavior lasts longer and reaches more serious dimensions than normal and reaches impressive dimensions in relation to the life and environment of the child or adolescent.

What about your child's behavioral disorders so advanced that you will be diagnosed with KGB?

Let's get to know the discomfort a little more to understand that. Children and adolescents with this diagnosis refuse to follow the rules set by adults and exhibit stubbornness. In addition to being disobedient, they quickly become angry, cry easily, and often have an angry and incapable attitude. They are likely to have frequent arguments and have difficulty controlling their anger during the argument. In general, they do not recognize a problem in themselves, blaming others for their own mistakes, especially authority figures such as parents, teachers or teachers. These children and adolescents may also be impatient and intolerant towards their families.

Adolescents diagnosed as KGB, unlike children, may be inclined to deliberately incite and provoke others. They may exhibit an attitude aimed at the opposite side in defect-finding, annoying, critical attitudes. Again, this attitude is aimed at parents or teachers in general and may impose patience.

According to DSM-IV, the diagnostic criteria of KGB are as follows:

● Frequent raging
● Having frequent discussions with adults
● Disobeying and rejecting adult requests
● The desire to aggravate and provoke others
● Blame others for his own negative behavior
● Easy irritation
● Easy offense and resentment
● Grudge and revenge

Children and adolescents who have at least four of the above behaviors for six months are considered to have this disorder.


Although the reasons are not fully understood, the KGB is thought to have arisen from the internalization of the negative interaction in human relations. There are theories that the methods used by parents and other authority figures affect the behavior of children and adolescents.

It is thought that KGB occurs more frequently in family settings where certain factors exist. One of these factors is that the rules set by the family are too harsh, too loose or unstable. Another factor is the inconsistent application of these rules and discipline by the family. In addition, studies have shown that at least one parent in the families of children diagnosed with KGB is a negative example of a child or adolescent, with opposing attitudes in their own relationships. Likewise, in these families, at least one parent is not emotionally or physically intimate with the child due to his or her own problems.

Some theories argue that there may be a genetic factor in KGB. However, most of the researches show that this discomfort seen in families may be caused by common breeding patterns that pass from generation to generation rather than genes.

Treatment Process:

Both the child or adolescent and the family play an important role in the treatment process of KGB. Considering that KGB is a behavioral disorder seen in children and adolescents, the goal of the treatment is to eliminate the negative and harmful behaviors of the child and to ensure that he / she learns the right behaviors and starts to use them in his / her social relationships. In this way, the child's relationship with the environment and especially with the family to improve and maintain.

The family also has important duties in the treatment process. The rules of the family and their consistency, and the awareness of children about their behavior, play an important role in the treatment of this condition. In this context, ideal treatment should be a process involving both cognitive behavioral methods and family therapy. It is also important to keep in mind that children and adolescents with such behavioral disorders can be diagnosed early, and that long-term and efficient outcomes can be achieved even if no visible results are obtained at first.

ELELE Child and Family Counseling Development and Education Center


(212) 223 91 07


1) American Psychiatric Association. (2000). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV-TR). American Psychiatric Pub, Inc.

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